Happy Birthday America. This July 4th edition of 100 word song will be a little subdued. I’m running a 10K, the annual Peachtree Road Race, tomorrow so I’m already exhausted and going to bed early. Helene Troy is written, chaptered, and now comes some more editing. I hope to announce her being available to everyone, very soon. I got great news and feedback today. Also, Andy Griffith died today. He was a country and folk musician and singer in the 1940s and 1950s as well as a brilliant storyteller. I think he’d appreciate today’s choice. I went back to our buddy Marian. Her 100 was brilliant and I knew she was itching to drop some Americana on us http://www.runawaysentence.com/2012/07/cloud-hotel.html She chose Tim Eriksen’s Leave The Light On. Eriksen is from the band Cordelia’s Dad and also lives in Marian and Cameron’s backyard. Cordelia’s Dad handled the excellent soundtrack to the very good Nicole Kidman movie, Cold Mountain, about 9 years ago. This song is wide open to interpretation and the somber mood is very relatable to me, currently. I’m expecting more awesome from each of you. Thanks to Raquel aka @Ms_Baldman for the Ani Di Franco last week.
For my 100, we go back to Jake and his daughter Violet from Soul To Body. I’m dropping three prompts here, 100 word song, “Fireworks” from Trifecta and “murmur” from my friend Velvet at velvetverbosity.com
Last time: http://lancemyblogcanbeatupyourblog.wordpress.com/2012/06/26/100-word-song-cloud-blood/
Jake swore he heard Camille murmur over the flat line noise of the machine.
“Mr. Hanna, she’s gone. We’ll leave you and your daughter with her for a few minutes.”
His wife’s hand fell away. Jake tried to yell “no” but was unable. Violet’s cry became hysterical and she threw herself onto her father .
“Vi, she said something. Did you hear it?”
Violet looked up, her teenaged face a fireworks display of tears, smudged eyeliner, and strands of yellow hair in front of her eyes.
“Yeah, dad, She said goodbye.”
Jake woke from his hospital bed, haunted by the memory.
Now, you’ve gone and made me cry.
well, thanks. I was trying to.
Woah. That Violet heard it but Jake didn’t. Ouch.
Yeah, what Tara said.
That was powerful Lance. A “goodbye” that a lot of us never get to hear.
Strong write…so sad. Your blog is interesting…I’ll take a look around.
Beautiful. Poor Jack.
Goodbyes are always painful. You just put the pain in words and imagery.
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What a great image you painted with the fireworks of displaced teenage makeup. Wow.
thanks so much
thank you karen, very much
Oh, I’m glad he’s awake, but what a memory to wake to. And poor, dear Violet.
i think she’s stronger than you know
No doubt. But she shouldn’t HAVE to be. Stupid conflict in stories
Another emotion packed moment tucked between the lyrical compose of another great song.
thank k
Ugh. Just a few words but hits you in the gut. Love how you used “fireworks” to describe the emotions on Vi’s face
I suppose having him wake up in a Motel 6 would have ruined the mood… but they DO leave the light on for you.
you have no clue how close I was to writing 100 words about a motel 6…see, we’re wired the same
This is a marvelous little scene. I’m so glad he wakes up from his accident. I hope he wakes up from his stupidity soon too
.
Also, I love discovering music that’s new to me since you started the 100 Word Song. These lyrics are gorgeous.
Oh. When you put me in the room with them, when I can see Vi’s face, feel her body hit mine with her grief, well that’s excellent writing. This one just tore me apart, losing someone for any reason, hurts like nothing else.
thanks…i wrote this several weeks ago, right after my father in law passed. It affected me too.
Thanks for linking up to Trifecta this week, Lance. Especially with everything you’ve got going on. Your Facebook page tells us that you survived the race, so congratulations there. Also, we are waiting with bated breath for your good news. Spill it! Great write here. I was going to write the exact same thing Karen said. One of the better uses of the word I’ve read this week.
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I’ve linked up with a little snippet from Michaela.
saw, commented, and Leeroy’s dancing
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