Rip It Up


Linda tried to ignore her date looking past her as she read the next beat poem and waited for a coffee. Her friend Mary Beth had said Dwayne was a more than a cool cat. But Linda wasn’t seeing the same guy. While his well-groomed reddish blonde beard was attractive, his wandering eyes and bored body language were making for a bad night.

“This is the last time I let Mary Beth set me up,” she mumbled under her voice as she turned the page.

Dwayne swallowed the last drop of his dark tea, and let go of a ferocious yawn. Linda played with her short, jet-black bangs and finished the last stanza of the poem. Without warning, he extended his right hand and touched the knuckles on each of Linda delicate, thin fingers.

“Linda, I dig you and that poem is boss but you ever want to just find a ride and get away from the lies?”

The question seemed odd, but Linda realized why Mary Beth thought they’d hit it off. Wanderlust was the most common denominator between her and the good-looking beatnik across the diner’s booth.

“Dwayne, it’s all I ever think about. I just don’t want small town life being the way I want to live. Where would you want to go?”

He pulled away and moved his back against the diner’s wall a few inches behind him. He pushed a soft pack of Lucky’s to the top of his African pattered shirt pocket. Linda didn’t smoke, and her split-second eye dart, caught Dwayne by surprise and he backed off pulling out a cigarette.

“San Francisco. I’d get an old jalopy, hit the route and have a blast by the bay. You want to go?”

His finger stroke of his fresh beard provoked a grin from Linda. She found him attractive, almost gorgeous, and smarter than he tried to come across.

“Dwayne Fogg, I just met you. I think you need to make me feel like a second date would be a blast for us, or at least me.”

She smirked. Linda didn’t mean a word of what she said. Hopping in the passenger seat of a crazy car and making a new adventure two thousand miles away from their midwestern town was everything she’d thought about since graduating teacher college a year earlier.

Dwayne touched her hands again. The way he caressed each of her knuckles was full of lust. She licked her lips and didn’t bother to wonder if her behavior was loose.

“Linda, I got, like, two quarters left. How about I play a few songs that get us moving and we write a poem of our own about San Francisco. I bet there’s some Little Richard in that juke box.”

A few minutes earlier Linda thought her first date with Dwayne would be lost to boredom, but finding common thread in getting the heck away from their lives made her feel that she could spend a lot more time with him. Now, he wanted to dance to Little Richard. Anything could happen.

****blogger’s note*****

This is my response to Wendryn for Scriptic Collective – write about a couple on a first date in a 1950s diner.

For the Scriptic.org prompt exchange this week, Trish at http://www.hghtashbry.wordpress.com gave me this prompt: A couple is on a first date in a 1950′s diner.

I gave Wendryn at http://www.wendryn.com this prompt: It’s better that you don’t know

If you’d like to use links instead, please use this format:
For the Scriptic prompt exchange this week, Trish gave me this prompt: A couple is on a first date in a 1950′s diner..

I gave Wendryn this prompt: It’s better that you don’t know

Trish’s Twitter is @arrowsmithedito and Wendryn’s Twitter is @wendryn. When you tweet about your post, please include their information.

When you have posted a response (before Thursday at midnight (EST) to be included in our announcements) post it on your blog and tell us about it on Scriptic.org under the prompt exchange for this week, October 5-11, 2012.\

Today’s song is the oldest thing I’ve ever played. From 1956, here’s the arctitect of rock n roll, Little Richard.

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8 responses to “Rip It Up

  1. Lance…you need to reread this and fix your boo boos. There are some missing words, switched up spelling of names and words in the wrong order :P

    It could be a great little flash but the typos distract from the story.

    I’ll wait :)

      • Okay, so is it Dwayne or Dewayne? You have both spellings :)

        Still a few issues though: “With his well-groomed reddish blonde beard was attractive but his wandering eyes and bored body language were making for a bad night.” You need a ‘he’ before was attractive.

        “Linda played with his short, jet-black bangs and finished the last stanza of the poem” Shouldn’t it be ‘her’ short, jet black bangs?

        And I just can’t help myself. I read this line: “Dewayne Fogg, I just met you. I think you need to make me feel like a second date would be a blast for us, or at least me.”

        All I can think is that Carly Rae Jepson song

        “Dewayne Foog, I just met you. And this is crazy. But here’s my number…so call me, maybe” :)

  2. Pingback: Weekly Roundup: October 5-11, 2012 | scriptic.org

  3. Even with the typos – I like this story. I’d love it if there was a jump from dancing to the couple 20 years from now. In suburbia, driving a station wagon – wondering where all that wanderlust went.

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